Dutch men don't bake anything

BETWEEN THE SHEETS

A large dating site conducted research into the bed performance of the European man and surveyed 12,940 of its female members. And what turns out: women in Europe do not see the Dutch man as romantic and they find him a mediocre kisser. The German is seen as the most romantic (but come on, you wouldn't expect that?) and the Italian man seems to be the best kisser. But there is also good news; in terms of endurance, the Dutch man scores surprisingly well again. All numbers averaged yield the following score list:

So, the Dutch man sucks and not in a good way. Enough reason to ask around here at the editorial office about dramatic Dutch bed performances.

“I dated a guy for a while and every time I just looked at his dick he would scream about how he was almost coming. I guess I should take it as a compliment but it made me super nervous.”

“My very first boyfriend was so panicked about holes in the condom that every time we were going to have sex he held the condom under the tap to see if it wasn't leaking. He could spend half an hour on that and in the meantime, I was just lying there waiting. Seriously. How he managed to put that thing back on afterwards is a mystery to me.‘

“Men can be such drama queens. I once had a boyfriend who only wanted to fuck, but I didn't really want that at the time so I wanted to kiss and be romantic. To which he said: “Please, help me. It’s huuuuurting.” Then I seriously asked my brother if not coming really hurt. Little did I know.”

but everything else indicated that it was going to be a party as soon as the coast was clear

“There was a guy who held my head during oral sex. And tightly too. I spat his whole load on his belly and never invited him again.”

“The tallest man who ever lay in my bed turned out to have the smallest dick ever. I had to jerk him off from above if you know what I mean.”

“I had a number of very successful dates with an incredibly handsome man, and those dates also sometimes ended up in my bed. I was on my period so we didn't do The Deed, but everything else indicated that it was going to be a party as soon as the coast was clear. Really, there was a huge tension between us. But it went a bit differently. When we finally did ‘it’, nothing happened at all. As in: it was devoid of any passion, so boring, it was dead silent, he got super nervous and had no idea what he was doing and we both knew that this was totally shit but said nothing about it. The next morning he left early and we haven't had contact since. Until about 2 years later when we ran into each other in a pub, got drunk, went home together and it was AGAIN a disaster. With some people, it just doesn't work.”